What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

When have you been in an accident where the other person involved blatantly lied to the police about what transpired?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Illinois coach Bret Bielema asked, so we answered: How the SEC has fared against Power Four in recent years - CBS Sports

What do you mean son?

Do you know what she said mum?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

Why do so many men wait until they are retired or close to it to start having sex with Men? Most of them say they have always wanted to suck dick or be fucked. Why did you wait?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

What! how could you do that?

What are some common medications prescribed for anxiety while traveling?

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!